Cowboy Nation Week 10 Power Ranking

Inigo Montoya: You are sure nobody's follow' us?

Vizzini: As I told you, it would be absolutely, totally, and in all other ways inconceivable. No one in Guilder knows what we've done, and no one in Florin could have gotten here so fast. - Out of curiosity, why do you ask?

Inigo Montoya: No reason. It's only... I just happened to look behind us and something is there.

Vizzini: What? Probably some local fisherman, out for a pleasure cruise, at night... in... eel-infested waters...

Vizzini: INCONCEIVABLE.

Inigo Montoya: He’s right on top of us. I wonder if he is using the same wind we are using.

(Vizzini has just cut the rope The Dread Pirate Roberts is climbing up)

Vizzini: HE DIDN’T FALL? INCONCEIVABLE

Inigo Montoya: You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

The Power Rankings are back? Inconceivable! Team Beastmode has roared to the top of the standings? Inconceivable! In Dog We Trust, who held strong in the top three for the majority of the season, might not make the playoffs? Inconceivable! That word, surely, doesn’t mean what many thought it meant throughout Cowboy Nation this season. With four games left until the playoffs, the kitchen is hotter than ever. And as Coach Conway will tell you, if you can’t handle the heat, well..you get the rest (especially Smelley).

1) The Raging Sherpas – Shea Dixon: (8-1) The Sherpas have clinched their spot in the playoffs. Their seed, on the other hand, is yet to be determined. The Sherpas have battled all season with the Rangers for the league’s top spot. It’s a whole new ballgame when the playoffs come, and one of any of the seven teams will have the same shot at running the table and claiming the league’s top honor. Yet, the road will be much easier if the Sherpas can sit in Week 14 and watch the field become cut in half for the second week in a row, their safety assured through the league’s lone bye-week playoff team. Come Week 15, the top seed will play its first playoff game with only three other teams still alive. Big stakes are up for grabs. Tom Brady has anchored the team, but drafting the league’s 3^rd and 6^th best HBs don’t hurt either (LT and MBIII). Toss in four WR’s that sit in the top 25 for the league, including Terrell Owens, and you can raise the question that this team shouldn’t have dropped a game. The stretch run is tough, however. The Sherpas will have to sit Tom Brady this weekend against Dean, forcing in a backup QB yet to be named (the Sherpas don’t currently have a backup QB). The team has managed itself well lately, for it has been as simple as {enter good player here} and watch him reach double digits. Starpower, however, has its price. Will the Sherpas be of any value if they are still alive in Week’s 15 and 16, where most of the team’s stars will be sitting on their proverbial benches.

2) Walker TX Ranger – Brian Norris: (7-2) With the Bengals off to a slow start, Carson Palmer has not put of the 20 point weeks that fantasy owners in the past years have come to rely on. Adrian Peterson slowed up two weeks ago, but made up for it this past weekend with a game that no rookie has any business putting out. He danced to the tune of 30 carries for 296 yards, good for an NFL RB record. Travis Henry has been slowed all season by injury, almost to the point where the Rangers have had to look elsewhere for point production from a player who is supposed to put of conistently first-round value numbers. Toss in Javon Walker’s injury and the Broncos look to have a personal vendetta against Chuck’s cause. Fuck em’. The Rangers still lead the league in points scored, raking in 892 points in nine weeks of football. At WR, Moss has been the beneficiary of nearly all the points out of the position. Neither Kevin Walter nor Antwaan Randle El can pull in the touchdowns needed. If Favre continues to gun-sling, then James Jones might be the team’s best option to fill the second WR slot. The Rangers did battle with the Sherpas for the number one spot, and were tagged with their second loss. When the next best team came calling this past weekend, the Rangers doubled up on Team Beastmode’s point total. How’s that for a beastmode?

3) Team FAITH – Jason Burklow: (6-3) This team is Appalachian State Hot, Hot, Hot! After starting a lowly 1-4, this team had the FAITH that the Saints have had. And, just like his team, he has pulled off quite the win streak (5 to be exact). Drew Brees is finally paying off, and in a big way. McGahee will have to continue to carry the running game, seeing that neither Ryan Grant nor Ahman Green is a legitimate candidate to bring in points consistently. Reggie Wayne has gotten plenty of Payton’s attention with Harrison out, which has helped this team out big time. They need Andre Johnson to get healthy, for that would add 15 points to this teams total every week, which will be extremely important in the coming weeks. The Steelers defense is an impressive point raker, especially against the lowly Ravens offense Monday night. FAITH seems the overwhelming favorite to take out Smelley this weekend, which would give Burklow six straight wins. This train might not stop until Week 16.

4) Team Beastmode – Daniel Roane: (6-3) The party finally stopped at Beastmode camp this past weekend, and in a big way. Chuck Norris came to town, and basically told Roane to go back to the 60-point club where he belongs (and that’s just what Roane did, losing 126-62). This team still has plenty going for it. Peyton Manning is still Manning. Braylon Edwards Pro-Bowl season isn’t slowing down in the least bit. Dallas Clark is still finding ways to get points from the TE position. And the Patriots defense is almost as valuable to Roane as a second RB, maybe even first. Speaking of, the situation for Beastmode at the run spot is hitting dire straits. Kevin Jones and Earnest Graham? This team, yes this 6-3 team on the rise, dropped off Maurice Jones Drew weeks ago. For who? Earnest Graham? With Bowe down and out after his slow start, Roane surely has to wish he still had Colston. Hurts catching the raw end of the Ronnie Brown deal, who went down for the season moments after Roane acquired him. Hey, there’s always Chris Brown.

5) Greek Mafia – Andrew Mijalis: (4-5) The Mafia fell to Smelley this past weekend. Chalk it up to a great performance by You Can’t See Me, who put up over 100 for the first time this season. Derek Anderson fell into the lap of Mijalis as a top three QB, and Clinton Portis has continued to perform well, matching preseason value and expectations. Maurice Jones Drew was the free agent pick up of the season, so much so it was worthy of a message board call out from Mijalis to Beastmode owner Daniel Roane. “Thanks for Maurice Jones Drew”. Roane’s reply: “Watch him sit behind Fred Taylor,” or something to that extent. Yeah, so insert foot in mouth, etc. MJD has become a top 20 RB, even while splitting carries. The only troubling stat from this team all season has been its inability to strike on Jamal Lewis and his big weeks. Lewis has had monster days in week two, four, and nine; none of which he started for the Mafia. Water under the bridge. This team has its eyes on the playoffs. The spot won’t matter. This team should hope to come out 3-1 with it’s remaining schedule to sit on the top half of the playoff teams. Yet, A sub .500 performance could go as far as knocking them out of the playoffs entirely. Thin ice to skate.

6) In Dog We Trust – Beau Fleming: (5-4) The Dog’s have lost another two straight. This team has been up and down more than they would like to have been. Bulger has been a complete disappointment, and can almost single handedly be responsible for much of this team’s overall disappointing aura (much in the same way Flynn is responsible for our only loss and if a game stays close, it’s his fault entirely). Things just work that way. Bulger is a curse to this team. Yet, the starter he must remain. Following in his footsteps has been the injuries to Brandon Jacobs, Marvin Harrison, Chad Johnson, and others. Hell, the best thing going for this team, outside of Jason Witten, is Ocho Cinco (who ironically isn’t performing to his potential) and the Giants defense. Scary stuff, and Halloween’s over. No more time for tricks and treats. This team, somehow, has gotten to week 10 above .500. The feeling from the coaching staff is that they are holding on for dear life, hoping to reach the playoffs, where healthier players can be put onto the field. They get Baby Matrix this weekend, one of the league’s least consistent team. Roane, Smelley, and Dean follow that. If Fleming can split these games, the playoffs have a spot for Dog. Stay with Christ, bro. Want a cig?

7) I’m 40, I’m a Man – Jon Kastanos: (4-5) The commissioner, who has claimed victory once through a controversial tie-breaker, now bulk up their team in a big way. First thing first, at this point in the season, Jesse Chatman will add no value to Jon’s team. So, in essence, it was Colston and Rudi Johnson for Willie Parker and Santana Moss. Come on, Ty. Are you serious? You gave up Colston for Santana Moss, and swapped Willie Parker for Johnson, who will be healthy in game or two? One win and you start giving away your team? What makes one team weaker, obviously, makes the other that much stronger. Check this starting lineup. Tony Romo, Joseph Addai, Rudi Johnson, Donald Driver, Marques Colston, and Ben Watson. Whose dick to we have to beat around here to magically get a dynamic fantasy line-up with the snap of a finger? Obviously, Jon knows to grab the lotion and walk down the LBP Town Home streets.

8) Rick Astley – Matt Conway: (it doesn’t matter) Who gives a shit what Conway’s record is. He’s the man. Though he gave Jon a hell of a good team, he got a hell of a good team back. Is he making the playoffs? Probably not. But he might win out. Hell, he predicted he would finish a strong 5-0. Last week was his first test, and he bitch slapped Dean 95-80, as promised. Now, Conway has his eyes set on Walker TX Ranger. “I’m gonna fuck Chuck Norris up this weekend.” If he does, Astley will continue to crawl up in the rankings. And his line-up ain’t half bad: Brian Griese, Marshawn Lynch, Willie Parker, Roy Williams, Lee Evans, Kellen Winslow, and the Redskins D. Getcha’ Gutta’a Gear, Ty.

9) Long Ball Larry – Dean Mijalis: (4-5) Since you’re a Cowboy fan, I’ll throw you a bone you can relate too. Remember when Tom Brady came to town in Week 6? He tossed for 388 yards and five touchdowns. Not too shabby of an outing. Got the Sherpas 34 fantasy points. Ironically, that is the same number of points Stephen Jackson has gotten….all season. WARNING: If you own a Rams player, please quit playing him. Here’s a tip. I am playing you this week. Start Justin Fargas. That gives you a better chance of winning. I want you to lose, but I am giving you help because you still seem to want to start Jackson. It’s kind of like when you are an A&M fan. Every week you put out a team that you think can compete and do it, but in your heart of hearts you know that they just don’t have it (like losing to Kansas...in football). All is in good fun though. If, or should I say when, this team makes the playoffs they will be scary. McNabb hasn’t been flashy, but Westbrook, Burress, Boldin, and Davis are a nice touch. With the RB situation hitting dire straits, this team probably wishes they hadn’t let go of the lowly Lee Evans so quickly, for a trips WR start would help this team come playoff time.

10) Baby Matrix – Andrew Ashby: (2-7) Brett Favre. Reggie Bush. Greg Jennings. Antonio Gates. Vikings D. Kris Brown. All these guys have been fantasy studs, but they haven’t equated into wins for the Matrix. Seeing that this team must win out to make the playoffs, the Matrix are a long shot to get to the seventh spot. Yet, don’t count Ashby out quite yet. Word from my underground sources is that he was heavy on trade talks with fellow bottom-dwelling owners, looking to crash the party for the teams on the playoff bubble. Watch out Cowboy Nation, Boomtown stops at nothing.

11) You Can’t See Me - Ryan Smelley: (4-5) Finally, a team name that makes sense! The “you can’t see me” move, which originated with wrestler John Cena (as Smelley's avatar image credits) can mean two things. On the one hand, it means “you can’t see me”. Much like “I can’t see” this team making the playoffs. On the other hand, it can mean “make that money,” or “make money”. Equating the title to the team, that means “make that $60,” which is the amount the person who comes in last place must pay to the pot (double the entry fee). LenDale White, the great hope of this team, isn’t as good as team owner Smelley thinks he is, especially if he plays hurt week to week. Santonio Holmes has had three good games all season, and Torry Holt has only had four. Put it this way. The highest rated player by position on this team is Chris Cooley. And, for the oddest reason, it seems fitting that Cooley is the best player on Smelley’s team. I don’t know why that makes me smile, but it just fits together. If Smelley were in the NFL, he would be Chris Cooley. Except he would probably play for the Raiders and not be as good. And one more thing. Now that Larry Johnson’s out for the season, you better get Priest Holmes. But don’t wait up until 3 a.m. Thursday morning to see if you land him. Conway is picking him up for no reason other than to make your team worse.

12) The Phoenix – Patrick Crawford: (2-7) Bottom line here is that this team never found a WR. And they banked on Lee Evans all season, who has been through two other teams before he finally is getting hot. Steve Smith has carried the Panthers by himself, still only having sporadically good weeks. Shockey has been consistent for the TE spot, and the Titans defense has been surprisingly solid. Frank Gore’s absence has been an extreme pain in the side of the Phoenix all season, and LaMont Jordan couldn’t get his motor running when his name was called. Things just never pieced together. It was one bad things after another, week in and week out. They will get their shot at Team Beastmode this week. The role of spoiler is on. My prediction: The Phoenix soar to 3-7 behind the arm of Big Ben to Hines Ward as well as Edge’s biggest game so far this season. Take it to the bank….just not the playoffs.

Cowboy Nation Week 6 Power Rankings

“I dont mind stealing bread
From the mouths of decadence
But I cant feed on the powerless
When my cups already overfilled” – Temple of the Dog “Hunger Strike”

Some teams here are on a hunger strike. The league is wide open, and as heated as ever. Will the bottom dwellers rise to playoff prominence? Can the front runners capture the early playoff spot, or will they fade out as midseason gets underway? Questions remain unanswered. Nobody is perfect anymore, so all the chips are on the table. Add to that the heat that the Commissioner is feeling over the playoff vote, which is now a proposal between three choices: 6, 7, or 8 team playoff? When all is said and done, Cowboy Nation is anybody’s for the taking. However, the one thing that we can be certain of is, the league has never been this hot.

1) The Raging Sherpas – Shea Dixon: (4-1) An odd spot to be in, but the Sherpas dropped a game this weekend and remain at the number one spot. The Sherpas were involved in their first slugfest of the season, coming out on the losing end of the affair to Kastanos, 71-65. Tom Brady has proven he is one of the best QB’s to have running the team, and the LT to boot isn’t bad. What is troubling is that the Cowboys are winning, and doing it without Terrell Owens and Marion Barber III. T.O. should soon get the balls back his way, but it seems the Cowboys will not get over Jones-Barber III splitting time. Brandon Marshall and Calvin Johnson have both been somewhat reliable as a second WR, but there is need for improvement. This roster has been one of the most reliable in the league. The Sherpas need to bounce back this week against the Bottom Dwellers, for Chuck Norris comes calling in Week 7.

Last Week’s Ranking: 1

2) Walker TX Ranger – Brian Norris: (4-1) The Rangers didn’t have much too offer this week. Carson Palmer and AP were on bye weeks. Maroney sat out. Javon Walker sat out. Even Trent Green went down!

http://youtube.com/watch?v=CQhsrpAZ_a8

You just got punk’d Chuck Norris!

This team might have trouble getting on track this week against Dean, but they will at least be in better health and numbers. This team has started off red hot. Can they keep it up as midseason comes near? Doubt has surrounded this team, but the points still show. On the website that matters in the end, this team is the best in Cowboy Nation.

Last Week’s Ranking: 2

3) Bad Newz Kennels – Beau Fleming: (4-1) Wow. The Kennels game with Greek Mafia was almost as exciting as the Monday Night game that decided its outcome. The Kennels needed 27 to tie, and all they had to offer was a TE and a K. Greg Olsen, formerly known as “Mr. I Don’t Get in the Game”, went off for the Mafia, pulling in an unexpected 11 points and a TD. Maurice Jones-Drew, formerly punk’d by Team Beastmode, dried his eyes and put together a solid week, adding 17 points to the board. But wait, the Cowboys throw 6 INTs and turn the ball over seven times. And, Witten puts up 16 points while Nick Folk goes 4-4 on the night with the game winner, topping off the Kennels with 16 more points to take down Mijalis by 5. Questions remain with the team, despite the successful start. The downfall of Marc Bulger left this team with little production from the QB spot. However, recent trades have put big names on this team. If people get healthy, this team can be easily argued for as the best in the league.

Last Week’s Ranking: 3

4) I’m 40, I’m a Man – Jon Kastanos: (3-2) The win Monday night over the Sherpas was the biggest win possibly of the season. Not only did it keep this team above .500, but showed that Romo could play the worst game of his career and the team would fair well. When Addai gets healthy, this is an amazing roster. Without him, questions remain. He doesn’t have his handcuff in Kenton Keith, who showed he can carry the rock by getting 27 points in Addai’s absence. The Colts are a playoff team, so they might be able to sit an unhealthy Addai if he needs to be nursed in the coming weeks, or towards the end of the season. There lies the problem for Kastanos, leaving this team with only one running back and a slew of banged up receivers.

Last Week’s Ranking: 4

5) Team Beastmode – Daniel Roane: (3-2)

http://youtube.com/watch?v=4JMOh-cul6M

You know what this is?

This is Team Beastmode. And you know what that means?

You’re about to get beastmoded

I am gonna beastmode every team that plays me

Ashby? Beastmoded. Dean Mijalis? Beastmoded.

You know what else that means?

I drop Maurice Jones Drew..

And if anyone’s got a problem with that, fuckin’ skanks.

Skank. Skanks. Fuckin’ skank.

Yo, chief, let me get a couple of Chris Brown’s down here.

Yeah I drafted Brian Leonard.

That’s because I’m the man, and everyone should know it.

Everyone: “Roane, why are you drafting all these shitty players?”

Roane: “Not now, Chief, I’m in the fucking zone.

Yeah I drop solid FF halfbacks.

I do that shit for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

I’m in control! I’m in fuckin’ control!

Two fuckin’ Chris Brown’s down here, chief

I’m gonna win this weekend. Im gonna start Chris Brown and Earnest Graham. Guys with Brown’s talent…I shower in that shit.

Chris Brown. Chris Brown. Fuckin’ Chris Brown.

Last Week’s Ranking: 8

6) Dick Lyons Jr. – Dean Mijalis: (3-2) It didn’t take much. Heck, Mijalis had the 53 he needed to win before Lynch stepped on the field Monday night. Mijalis rolled by the Pheonix with ease, who have now dropped three straight. From the look of the trades made, this team seems happy to be where they are at. They have lost all production from that has come thus far from the TE spot, and took a hit at the WR slot. But as the weeks come and go, this team will get healthy. And, when it does, it could be one of the more solid rosters in the league. Yet, time is money. And if people don’t get healthy, this team won’t find it easy to win games.

Last Week’s Ranking: 5

7) Greek Mafia – Andrew Mijalis: (2-3) As mentioned before, this team could have been 3-2 right now. The big comeback by Fleming was too much however, and Mijalis fell short once again. This team is dodging bye weeks right now, and look to get a full strength line up by at least Week 7. The Mafia have a good chance to bounce back this week against Riverside Towing, hoping not to drop two straight for the first time this season. The one question that remains is when Vince Young will come around and put up more numbers week in and out. Outside of that, and TE (one-hit wonder), this team is playoff strong. Putting wins together is the next step.

Last Week’s Ranking: 6

8) Team FAITH – Jason Burklow: (2-3) Burklow put a big win together this weekend, knocking off the then undefeated Walker TX Rangers. It was closer than many may think, for WR Randle El (TX Rangers) was tackled at the 1 yard line after a long catch and run. Had he gotten the extra yard, and touchdown, Burklow would be 1-4. It’s the little things that count. FAITH is still waiting on the production from Drew Brees, while McGahee has impressed as a FF standout HB thus far. With Andre Johnson out, this team struggles to find points at the WR spot. When he gets healthy, and Brees comes around, this team can put up some big numbers. Until then they sit on the bubble of teams looking to make the postseason. Wins from here on out are a must. Baby Matrix lays ahead this weekend, which should allow FAITH to climb to .500 through six games.

Last Week’s Ranking: 10

9) The Bottom Dwellers – Ryan Smelley: (2-3) And the Dwellers win again! Right now they are hot! Well, at least in the fact that they have won two games straight. It doesn’t hurt to mention the Dwellers basically were given a win against Riverside Towing, where more than half of Conway’s starting line up was out with injuries or bye weeks. But a wins a win. If Johnson can get consistent and earn his value, this team will be sitting very pretty at running back. The WR core could use some work, and the Dwellers will rely on them to at least score some TDs to help with point production in the coming weeks.

Last Week’s Ranking: 11

10) Riverside Towing – Matt Conway: (1-4) The decision to let Ronnie Brown go may hurt this team. Then again, two weeks ago we said the decision to take him so high was hurting him. Maybe Conway learned something at his white collar job this Summer. Sell it while it’s hot, baby! Maybe, just maybe, Brown will flop. Then again, the Dolphins are bad enough, so he will get his touches. If 30 point weeks become the norm, this trade will have been a heavy contributor to the downfall of the team. Riverside still has Johnson, who sat this week with a bye. When Rudi is hot, they will look to run 3 WRs with Colston, Roy Williams, and Boldin. On paper, that looks like a great team. However, through five weeks of NFL play, injuries and slow starts have made these players, well valueless. The QB spot looks like a week-to-week ordeal, so no bones to pick. Conway should be at full strength soon. Until then, losing games is getting him no closer to the playoffs.

Last Week’s Ranking: 7

11) Baby Matrix – Andrew Ashby: (1-4) This team cleaned house, and I feel like it might pay off huge for the Matrix. Bush could eventually come around, and the second HB spot isn’t flashy. Yet, they now have the Brett Favre-Jennings connection, which could continue to strike big all season. When the Texans get hot through the air again, trade bait looms with Matt Schaub at QB. Getting a HB there could be key. Cotchery is having a good year at WR, and should continue to match Jennings in production (though his numbers are much more unpredictable). This team looked nothing like the Matrix you’ve seen before. Ashby has a new hand, and it looks like he’s going all in.. (sorry but I couldn’t resist..)

Last Week’s Ranking: 12

12) The Phoenix – Patrick Crawford: (1-4) This team is in shambles. It seems inevitable that trades are on the way. Frank Gore and Edge are hot one week and not the next. Lee Evans is non-existent. Steve Smith can’t get a QB to get him the ball in Carolina. Dante Stallworth should continue to get points, but the way Brady spreads the ball around, nobody outside of Moss is going to put up gaudy numbers. This team just can’t seem to string together a set of wins, now having lost three straight. This team even dropped the hot Patrick Crayton, who the Cowboys have enjoyed throwing to while Terrell Owens has seen double teams all season. Another name change means another new week. Bold prediction: the Phoenix get break their losing streak this week against the Bad Newz Kennelz.

Last Week’s Ranking: 9

Cowboy Nation Week 5 Power Rankings

“I want a new drug
One that wont hurt my head
One that wont make my mouth too dry
Or make my eyes too red” – Huey Lewis and the News “I Want a New Drug”

A lot of teams are in need of a new drug. Bye weeks are coming on heavy. Not too mention the bust players of the season who are either underperforming or have gone down with injuries. Time for a new drug, and in Cowboy Nation, the free agent market isn’t exactly a talent pool. In fact, I would say it’s more like the CFL. It only seems imminent that trades soon come from the horizon before Sunday’s games begin.

1) The Raging Sherpas – Shea Dixon: (4-0) If I had a vote this past weekend, I wouldn’t have voted for USC to be jumped by LSU. There are two 4-0 teams in the league, and both are hot. As for the Power Rankings, the Sherpas stay at the top spot. And, frankly, not much is going wrong with this team. Tom Brady has been on point all season. Add T.O. and Marion Barber III to the list and you have three of the top players on the NFL’s two best teams. Fortunately for the Sherpas, that means points. LT finally got his engine running this past weekend, until they basically benched him at halftime. Though things are rocky in San Diego, LT should eventually get the touches he is paid for. The Sherpas have swept the competition thus far. Yet, the first “true” test should come this week against Kastanos.

Last Week's Ranking: 1

2) Walker TX Ranger – Brian Norris: (4-0) The Sherpas fell short of 100 points for the first time this season. The Rangers did the same, except it was only one point short of the mark, as they defeated the Shreveport Battlewings 99-54 in a game between two of the teams three undefeated teams. Now just two remain. As for the Rangers, Norris is sitting on two good things. For one, his player’s are all red hot, and he is the current point leader in the Cowboy Nation standings, which is what matters in the end. Two, he happens to be sitting on heavy trade bait. He has two of the top five QBs in the NFL on his roster. Trent Green should be safe to ride during his by week. So, let the offers roll, for it seems that either Brett Favre or (gasp) Carson Palmer could be on the trading block. With less touches going the way of Maroney and Co. in New England, offers also seem to be sought from Norris for a 2^nd running back behind AP. Whatever happens, if this team stays this hot, Chuck Norris should clinch a playoff spot halfway through the season.

Last Week's Ranking: 2

3) Shreveport Battlewings – Beau Fleming: (3-1) The Battlewings fell hard against the TX Rangers, putting up a season-low 54 points. Trouble is indeed brewing. This team has no QB, with Smith out four weeks and Bulger out indefinitely (given health and ineffectiveness). The bench doesn’t offer much, given half of its players are stricken with injury or buried beneath a depth chart. Jason Campbell will be this team’s starter, unless the Battlewings make a trade by Sunday. The WR core is fine, but moves at the RB and QB could be made to strengthen this team. Right now, team owner Fleming knows that he is in third place with a seventh or eighth place team. 3-1 is a great record to start off the season, yet time will tell if this team can battle injuries and manage bye weeks to capture a playoff spot.

Last Week's Ranking: 3

4) I’m 40, I’m a Man – Jon Kastanos: (2-2) This team was tough to not put at the number three spot. Through four weeks, Kastanos has put up the third most points in the league. The competition has also been tough, given Kastanos has had the 4^th most points scored on him in the four weeks combined. The three teams ahead of Kastanos also happen to be the three teams who have had the least amount of points scored on them thus far. This team is strong across the board, especially when anchored by Romo. Nothing flashy, but this team will put up points in the 80-plus range every week. Kastanos has a playoff team on his hands. Question is, can everyone keep pace with production thus far?

Last Week's Ranking: 5

5) The Aints – Dean Mijalis: (2-2) The Aints, well, ain’t doing much. They have put up the fourth least amount of points in the league, while sitting among the bottom half of the teams in the points against category. McNabb was a letdown this week, but the points aren’t coming because of injuries. Marvin Harrison remains banged up, while Stephen Jackson is still out (not to even say he will be back to form when he does return). Add to that the fact that Plaxico might not go this weekend, and Mijalis is looking at a tough week ahead. Not to mention it’s McNabb’s bye week, and The Aints don’t currently have another QB on the roster. Unless waivers fall the Aint’s way with the gift of points, Mijalis could fall to 2-3 this weekend, a far cry from how this team began the season.

Last Week's Ranking: 4

6) GREEK MAFIA – Andrew Mijalis: (2-2) It’s hard to argue that this isn’t the hottest team in the league, at least in respect to their slow start. Mafia has put up the league’s second least amount of points, but wins are wins, and this team is .500 after a 0-2 start that made them look like on of the worst teams in the league. And, if you didn’t catch Monday night’s showdown, it was a doozy. Down 19 points, MAFIA was led to victory by TJ Housh and Wes Welker, who combined for, you guessed it, 20 points. Then again, simply starting Jamaal Lewis would have sealed the deal much earlier for Mijalis. No harm no foul, and Mijalis will gladly welcome Vince Young and Clinton Portis back to the roster this week, able to snatch a surprising victory despite their absence.

Last Week's Ranking: 7

7) Intramurals Brother – Matt Conway: (1-3) Slow start. Injuries
. Etc. This team doesn’t just look good on paper, they look good when they get on the field. Problem is, the injury bug is living in the Brother’s house. That said, the players he needs to have on the field aren’t getting their very often. Rudi Johnson was out. Anquan Boldin was out. Vernon Davis is still out. Even Mark Clayton is banged up. Yet, when this team was down and out two weeks ago, it was head coach Dan Hawkins that kicked the team in the rear and got them their first win. It seems now, yet again, they have made the move that they needed. Moving out Ronnie Brown was risky, but when this team gets healthy, they are easily one of the most dangerous rosters in the league.

Last Week's Ranking: 6

8) Team Beastmode – Daniel Roane: (2-2) I’m not sure what to say here. The team plowed this weekend, but three of the players that added to the big point totals all went for their biggest weekends so far this season. That isn’t gonna happen every week. We’re in Baton Rouge, and Roane was mocked when he let half the rookie Tigers onto his roster. Buster Davis isn’t fantasy ready, but it seems Roane struck gold with Dwayne Bowe. Three TDs through four weeks is red-hot for the rookie WR. Stud WR Braylon Edwards also happens to be having the year of his life, running like a train after his slow week one start. Dallas Clark is the elite TE in the league right now, and Ronnie Brown gives Roane the production he lacked at RB. Problem is, where does he go from here? He acquired Chris Brown, but he is of no more value than Maurice Jones Drew, who Roane put on the free agent market just last week. So, in a sense, Roane traded Colston and Winslow for Brown. Of course, Brown is the load carrier in Miami. Yet, giving away two top playmakers in return for one seems like a decision of desperate times and measures rather than rationale thoughts.

Last Week's Ranking: 11

9) Shrute Farm Beets – Patrick Crawford: (1-3) It’s troubling that the Beets were at full strength this week and no starter, outside Big Ben, found the endzone. Frank Gore was held in check for the second week in a row. LaMont Jordan was in the same boat, and might find himself in a deeper hole given that Dominic Rhodes is coming off of suspension and is the hot item on the free agent market. Edge needs to find more production, but that can wait. What can’t is the WR spot. Every week Crawford tests a new tandem, and none have paid off. That bad luck continued when he released Patrick Crayton, who had a career day on Sunday and also looks to be a hot free agent item heading into this weekend. Then again, a career day is a career day. This might not ever happen again. Caveat Emptor.

Last Week's Ranking: 9

10) Team Faith – Jason Burklow: (1-3) All this team needs is faith and they are destined for the playoffs. Things in New Orleans are rocky, so hopefully the week off gave Drew Brees the time he needed to clear his head and begin to put up the fantasy numbers that his value comes with. The running game isn’t overly powerful, but it often gets the job done. When Andre Johnson gets healthy, this team has an extremely dynamic duo at the WR spot. The Steelers defense and Jeff Reed should continue to put up big points while things are going good in Pittsburgh. Faith.. I see this team climbing back above .500 soon.

Last Week's Ranking: 8

11) The Bottom Dwellers – Ryan Smelley: (1-3) Last week I said everyone was in the mix, even 0-3. The Dwellers proved that this week when they knocked out their first win of the season. In fact, Larry Johnson just might have arrived for team owner Ryan Smelley. Thomas Jones is not a bad sidekick to LJ, and Santonio Holmes had a scorching weekend. Eli at QB didn’t look bad against the Eagles, but he didn’t look amazing. He looked, well, like Eli. If Torry Holt can get the Rams sparked on offense, this team could be primed to make a run at a playoff spot. Don’t count out Marty and Co. And, let us not forget, Smelley lost out on Deuce when he went down for the season. If a run is made, Smelley will be one of the more impressive stories of the league.

Last Week's Ranking: 12

12) Baby Matrix – Andrew Ashby: (1-3) This team has lost three straight games and sit right at the bottom of the Power Rankings. Javon Walker has been injured half the season, while Devery Henderson and Roddy White offer little in his place. Getting Devery Henderson and Reggie Bush rolling will be huge for this team. When Johnson gets healthy, expect Schaub to take the reigns of this team. A hot Javon Walker won’t hurt either. This team needs help quick, so something must happen. Then again, Cowboy Nation is a $30 per team league. Owner Andrew Ashby probably has other things on his mind.

http://www.iprdata.com/ipr/eventDetail/id-3493.html

It is the International Poker Rankings database. And, of course, Baby Matrix is at #168, raking in over $4,000 at a satellite tournament for the WSOP. Add to that the $30,000 tournament that Ashby won at the Beau Rivage last month, and the bottom of the Power Rankings isn’t something he loses sleep over. In fact, he might just buy this site and shut it down..

Last Week's Ranking: 10

Cowboy Nation Week 4 Power Rankings

“Kick my brains around the floor
These are the days
It never rains it pours
Under pressure!” – David Bowie “Under Pressure”

The pressure is indeed on. Week four brings a new element into the fantasy season. By now, if your draft day golden-picks aren’t producing, it might be time to scramble for salvation. Three teams remain unbeaten. Add one to that and Cowboy Nation only has four teams above .500 after three weeks of play. Everyone is still alive. Even 0-3.

1) The Raging Sherpas – Shea Dixon: (3-0) Tom Brady, with a QB rating of 141.8, is the hottest passer on the hottest team in the league. Marion Barber III, while splitting time, is the 12^th leading rusher in the league. He also happens to lead the league in rushing TDs. Terrell Owens sits among the top five WRs in both the TD and receiving yards categories. Calvin Johnson hasn’t been much of a disappointment either, though the move for Brandon Marshall or Isaac Bruce could come any week now. Still, the #1 pick LT remains slow to start, with only 130 yards rushing and 1 TD on the ground through three weeks of play. The Sherpas will need him to get going if they hope to hold off the opposition for the long run.

Last Week’s Ranking: 1

2) Walker TX Ranger – Brian Norris: (3-0) Is this team the real deal? We know Carson Palmer’s passing attack is. Maroney has looked great, and I’m sure I don’t need to even start to explain the rookie explosion Adrian Peterson is having on the Minnesota turf. Greg Jennings, who was overshadowed as a rookie last season by Marques Colston, is off to another hot start in Green Bay. Then there is Mr. Moss, who is proving that he is still among one of the top WRs in the league (given you’re on the right team). This team is looking solid. At 3-0, and the only other team (Sherpas) to drop 100 points in all three weeks of play, owner Brian Norris might have a top-notch playoff team on his hands after all. Yet on a sidenote, we all remember the great Jim Rome conversation with Saints QB Jim Everett. http://youtube.com/watch?v=9HNgqQVHI_8

A similar conversation recently ensued after Week 3 of play between TX Ranger owner Brian Norris and Raging Sherpa owner Shea Dixon:

Norris: Continue to call me the WAC and Sun Belt

Dixon: I bet I do.

Norris: I bet you won’t.

Dixon: Sun Belt

See you in Week 7

Last Week’s Ranking: 4

3) Shreveport Battlewings – Lou Fleming: (3-0) The Battlewings remained hot once again, and fantasy stud Marc Bulger added a whopping 1 point to the Battlewings 97 point total. Fortunately, Brian Westbrook was part of the melee in Philly, adding 40 points at the RB spot. Chad Johnson is one of the top WRs in the league, and Bulger hasn’t performed, but this team may not make it all season running three mediocre WRs and one solid RB. Loosing Brandon Jacobs will eventually take its toll on the undefeated Battlewings.

Last Week’s Ranking: 2

4) Hurricane Dean – Dean Mijalis: (2-1) Hurricane Dean is sitting pretty. McNabb is on point. Plaxico Burress is having a Pro Bowl season. Marvin Harrison is, well, Marvin Harrison (though the numbers hadn’t reflected it yet). Only 2 cowboys caught passes in Sunday night’s game. Of course their was T.0. But then there was Jason Witten. With Phillips in charge, Dean is sitting pretty with Witten as the #2 option behind T.O. in one of the league’s most explosive offenses. But wait. Steven Jackson out three weeks? No worries. The young Marshawn Lynch is waiting on the bench, and thus far this fantasy season he is the hotter commodity. And that is that. The lone 2-1 team in the league rounds out the top four. It’s a dogfight from here on out.

Last Week’s Ranking: 3

5) I’m 40, I’m a Man – Jon Kastanos: (1-2) Kastanos is the first team to pull through from the 1-2 ranks. Tony Romo is back in at QB after sitting the week in place of Jake Delhomme, who was injured in the Carolina game. Joe Addai is looking better than his rookie campaign. Willie Parker and Donald Driver look on par through three weeks. Solid draft picks have this team in good shape heading into Week 4. The one question that remains is Reggie Brown. The Eagles let out a barrage of offense this weekend. Yet Brown was nowhere to be found, amassing just two points. Team Kastanos will need more from Brown, who they expected to be the top contributer at the #2 WR spot.

Last Week’s Ranking: 5

6) Intramurals Brothers – Matt Conway: (1-2) What is there to say? This team was losing because Ronnie Brown was not producing at all, and Boldin and Roy Williams weren’t throwing out gaudy numbers to make up for it. Now, everyone is. Mark Roy Williams down for 26 points. Add another 30 points for Boldin. Toss in Ronnie Brown’s 40 points and you have a winner right there. No need to mention Rivers got his first start for the Brothers, which makes him 1-0 as the QB of Coach Hawkins team. This team is hot. P.S. Rudi Johnson did nothing this weekend. The Brothers could have made it much worse on team WHO DAT.

Last Week’s Ranking: 12

7) Greek Mafia – Andrew Mijalis: (1-2) Now this team is kicking into gear. They have a win under their belt and are ready to roll. Papa Vince is bringing in respectable numbers at the QB position, while Shaun Alexander and Clinton Portis looked great. Boot that with Larry Fitzgerald and TJ Housh and this team looks really, really strong. And word out of Mafia-land is that deals are looking to be done to acquire a TE for this team. Guess that Ben Olsen “steal of the draft” didn’t pop off as planned. No worries. This team is heading nowhere but up.

Last Week’s Ranking: 8

8) WHO DAT – Jason Burklow: (1-2) Leinart or Cambell? That is the question. It was Cambell this week, where he performed a little below par for what team owner Burklow expects out of a QB. Then again, Leinart did worse. Reggie Wayne was quiet, while Santonio Holmes, as can be expected, was quieter. Could DeShaun Foster make a push for the starting line-up this week? 24 points is a lot to have sitting on the bench. DAT better find out, for they have dropped two straight and are on their way down the power chart.

Last Week’s Ranking: 6

9) Kirilenko Meets Ivan Drago – Patrick Crawford: (1-2) This team is roller coaster-like. Lose one week. Win the next. Lose one week. Well, you get the picture. Frank Gore finally stopped bulldozing people, which wasn’t good for Drago’s cause. Kitna remains on fire, as well as big daddy LaMont Jordan. Steve Smith only drug up 1 point in the QB fiasco that was in Carolina. Then there is that #2 WR spot. Hell, might as well leave it empty. Lee Evans does nothing. Patrick Crayton did nothing when he was asked to step up. Guess its is time for Lions WR Shaun McDonald too take over….

Last Week’s Ranking: 7

10) Baby Matrix – Andrew Ashby: (1-2) Calling all WRs? Javon Walker? Are you out there? Jericho Cotchery? Is that you I see with 5 fantasy points? Times are tough in Matrix camp. Being 1-2 is definitely in the thick of things, but no help at WR is tough. Travis Henry was a nice touch this weekend, and the season-ending injury to Deuce McAllister should give Reggie Bush more touches. At least Hasselback is getting points. Then again, so is Matt Schaub, who remains on the bench. Will a QB decision be made or will we see the Matrix stick with the gameplan. Dropping three straight games is nothing to smile about.

Last Week’s Ranking: 9

11) Team Beastmode – Daniel Roane: (1-2) Levee! Get this team together, son. This team badly needs a running game. Trade time! Who wants Maurice Jones Drew? Silence. Carnell Williams? Silence. Brian Leonard? “Ohh, me!” screamed undefeated Walker TX Ranger coach Brian Norris. “I can let him sit in the “empty” roster spot I have on my bench and I can laugh that you drafted him.” Oh, and the Saints suck. Which means Brees is having a bad year. Which means Colston is as well. At least Braylon Edwards is doing well. And there is always the 15-30 points of Peyton Manning. Outside that, team owner Roane needs to think trade talks before his team drops a second game in a row.

Last Week’s Ranking: 11

12) The Bottom Dwellers – Ryan Smelley: (0-3) Word out of Cowboy Nation is that people are beginning to root for the Bottom Dwellers to go 0-13. Drew Brees is in the downward spiral that is the Saints. Torry Holt is in the downward spiral that is the Rams. Larry Johnson is the bust of the draft. Even the Bears defense got trounced on. Hell, nothing is going right for this team! Oh wait, they have Jacobi Jones!

Last Week’s Ranking: 10

Cowboy Nation Week 3 Power Rankings

Week 3 Power Rankings:

“Patience is the companion of wisdom” - St. Augustine

After two weeks of play, a handful of preseason contenders find question marks across the board, while some less talented teams have sprinted out of the fantasy gates. Heading into week three, patience is what many owners need a heavy dose of. Cowboy Nation shakes down as follows:

1) The Raging Sherpas – Shea Dixon: (2-0) It doesn’t come as much of a surprise that the team with the #1 pick in the draft is the frontrunner out of the gates. What does come as a surprise is that the Sherpas #1 pick, LT, has a combined 22 points in two weeks of play. Fortunately Tom Brady, Terrell Owens, and Marion Barber III have looked like Week Three Pro Bowlers. Unfortunate for other owners, the rookie Calvin Johnson has scored in both weeks, and consensus fantasy king LT has yet to get his motor running.

2) Shreveport Battlewings – Lou Fleming: (2-0) The second spot is a tough one to grab heading into week three. The Battlewings, who drafted towards the bottom with the 8^th pick, have not seen the desired production out of their Brian Westbrook pick. Throw in the light production of Bulger (relatively speaking) as well as the injury to Brandon Jacobs and Fleming can find some relief in knowing they have yet to drop a game. Questions remain if the streak continues with Julius Jones and Brian Westrook carrying the running game.

3) Hurricane Dean – Dean Mijalis: (1-1) In the opening week of play Dean was just shy of the 100 point mark, and that is with the #2 pick in the draft, Steven Jackson, chipping in a mere 3 points. Marvin Harrison and Burress have been on target, with Burress the surprising hotter of the two. No touchdowns out of either of Dean’s two running backs through two weeks of play is simply a slow start. At 1-1 with underperforming players, Hurricane Dean looks like one of the tougher teams in the league.

4) Walker TX Ranger – Bryan Norris: (2-0) Call it the WAC, CUSA, or even the damn Sun Belt. The Rangers are undefeated, and have dropped over 200 points in two weeks of play. So what’s not to love? For one, no competition. Neither of his opponents have put up over 90 points. Second, Carson Palmer, or for now the Fantasy Colt Brennan, can’t carry this team every week. Nor will Randy Moss be one the league’s top wide out’s all season. On additional negative notes, the Maroney-Peterson combination doesn’t seem lethal for the long run in a league riddled with pairs of top backs, especially given that a rookie won’t remain on pace . A solid kicker in Viniatieri and defense in the Chargers is a bonus for this team. At the same time, a team can’t go all season relying on two heavy hitting point makers. However, the streak could continue against Baby Matrix, a team riddled with question marks, next week. A 3-0 start for the Rangers? It seems far fetched given that just a few weeks ago this team looked like one of the worst in the league.

5) Team Kastanos – Jon Kastanos: (1-1) Kastanos, who picked 11^th in the draft, went back-to-back with his pick of Willie Parker and Willis McGahee. Before Week One, McGahee was shipped out for the #5 pick in the draft, Joe Addai. Addai has produced, but little has come from the team’s WR corps, where the combination of Donald Driver, Santana Moss, and Reggie Brown have produced very little. Andre Johnson, who was shipped out in the McGahee trade, sure would have helped out the cause. For something to chew on, Team Kastanos would be 2-0 right now had they not made the league’s lone trade. To add salt to an open womb, having Johnson and McGahee’s statlines these past two weeks would have also made them the league’s leading scorer. Again, hindsight is always 20/20.

6) WHO DAT – Jason Burklow: (1-1) As mentioned above, Who Dat got the positive edge thus far, production wise, out of the pre-season trade with Team Kastanos. The only negative, red-hot WR Andre Johnson is now out indefinitely with a sprained knee. He is doubtful this weekend, and will probably not be back the following week either. DAT should survive in the mean time with Deion Branch, who had a solid performance in week two. QB Matt Leinart has been so-so points wise. Team owner Burklow has also yet to find a second RB, where both Derrick Ward and Ahman Green have shown solid fantasy production. DAT has no problem offensively thus far, sitting among the leaders in points scored. This team is not slowing down any time soon if things continue to play out as they have.

7) Kirilenko Meets Ivan Drago – Patrick Crawford: (1-1) I know, I know, no love. This team got hit by the Walker TX Ranger wave in Week One, where the Rangers threw down 104 points. But QB Jon Kitna has been Appalachian State Hot, Hot, Hot! Will it last? In a Mike Martz offense, taking Kitna with the draft’s 79^th pick is making Crawford look good. Dropping 111 points in Week Two makes them look better. However, questions remain for a 2^nd solid WR, where Ivan Drago’s 4^th pick in Lee Evans has already seen the bench for Patrick Crayton. With no WR help in sight, Ivan Drago has to hope that LaMont Jordan and Frank Gore remain to pile up points in weeks to come.

8) Greek Mafia – Andrew Mijalis: (0-2) Without a win does not seem like much to brag about in a list of Power Rankings, but Greek Mafia has surely been the shock of the league. On paper, this team came out of the draft red hot. Through two weeks of play, not so much. Vince Young has 32 points through two weeks, which is on par for what Mijalis is looking for at QB. Coaching decisions have also caused questions with the team. The team’s second pick and the 19^th in the draft, Clinton Portis, was benched in Week One for Brandon Jackson. Jackson was outperformed by 11 points. In Week Two, Portis made his first appearance and attributed 12 points in a loss. At the bottom of Mafia’s bench in Week Two, Jamaal Lewis was quietly carrying the ball 28 times for 215 yards and a TD. That’s 27 fantasy points. The decision on the two fantasy RBs to start next week against Ivan Drago will be big. Dropping to 0-3 is a tough hole to crawl out of.

9) Baby Matrix – Andrew Ashby: (1-1) Baby Matrix impressed in Week One. No doubt. Dropping 99 never hurt anyone’s chances of winning. Hasselback played great, and first round pick Travis Henry added some much needed points given the sophomore slump of Reggie Bush, whose 9 points in two weeks don’t combine for more than were he was picked at (a high 13). Fact of the matter is, the Vikings defense will not get 30 points a game probably again all season. That means points must come from elsewhere. And how much longer can the Matrix hold out on Matt Schaub, who is itching to play as the league’s hottest player off the bench.

10) Googly Moogly – Ryan Smelley: (0-2) “The league needs to watch out for Ryan Smelley.” Those were the words that rang from Team Kastanos owner Jon Kastanos during their Monday night match-up, where they were currently tied at 90 points a piece heading into the third quarter of Monday night’s Eagles/Redskins game. And, he’s right. Smelley put up a laughable 42 points in Week One. In fact, only ONE starter scored more than ten points (Torry Holt with 13). However, that does mean that Drew Brees, Larry Johnson, Deuce McAllister, and Darrell Jackson all went for under ten points. In fact, the four only combined for 16 points. This couldn’t happen all season, could it? Well, it happened in Week Two. Brees managed 14 points in a blowout loss, while both Johnson and McAllister stayed under the ten point mark. Holt put up 13 once again, while WR Joey Galloway made up for the lack of points with a monster 25 point game. Don’t expect that to happen every week for Galloway. Nor can you rely on Brees, Johnson, Deuce, and Jackson to never produce. This is a team that it waiting to bust open. The question is, will it come in Week 3 against the powerful Hurricane Dean?

11) Team Beastmode - Daniel Roane: (1-1) Peyton Manning? Check. Kellen Winslow? Check. Patriots defense? Check. And…that’s about it for Beastmode thus far. Sophomore Marques Colston has hit the Saints bump in the road, and Hines Ward isn’t much to talk about as a #2 WR. Then there is Brian Leonard and Maurice Jones Drew. The tandem-back has combined for only 9 points in two weeks of play. Carnell Williams has 24 points alone, and he is sitting on the bench. This team has nothing bright in its future unless Payton gets “Hall of Fame” like on them in a single season, amassing 7 touchdowns a week and winning all of the team’s fantasy games alone. Ain’t happening. Taking Manning with the fourth pick in the draft now seems like a mistake, for Team Beastmode has no running game and has hit a rut with wide receivers. Had he not taken Manning, Jones-Drew, Ward, and Colston Roane’s draft position could have landed him Frank Gore, Tom Brady, Reggie Wayne (or Moss/A Johnson) and Marion Barber III. Sounds like a team that wouldn’t be at the bottom of the fantasy barrel.

12) Intramurals Brother – Matt Conway: (0-2) Uh, oh… The Raichlens are winless. Time for a name change! This team needs a kick in the rear, and Coach Hawkins is just the man for the job. Then again, team owner Matt Conway has seen little in way of production thus far from his draft decisions. Jay Cutler is playing as good of football as he will all season, and his points still aren’t through the roof. Anquan Boldin has had an unexpected sluggish start, but that can also be chalked up to Leinart getting back into the swing of things. And don’t forget they throw to Fitz. Surely, this won’t happen all season for the Raichlens..I mean Brothers. They can get wins back. One thing that they can’t get back is the team’s second pick and the 15^th overall in the draft, where they took a struggling Ronnie Brown. A handful of other RBs and WRs would have dug him out of a hole that Brown can’t get out of. This could be the bust pick of the draft.